How to help someone in a low mood

Sometimes when you’re experiencing a low mood, it can feel that sharing your emotions with someone might burden them – usually because the feelings are so strong for you and you assume the other person will experience the same.

Quite the opposite is often true. When you reach out to someone and make yourself vulnerable and ask for help, or just an ear, it’s a gift to that person – it says, ‘I trust you’ and it creates space for them to give to you which has a very positive effect on them. Giving results in high vibration emotions, and quite quickly when a problem is shared, the negative emotions can simply dissipate or at least are significantly reduced.

We’re often on the receiving end of concern (usually from empaths of course) after a coaching session as clients worry that they have somehow burdened us or affected our mood. Here’s a few wee tips on how to not let someone’s problems or mood affect you so you can better support them.

If you’re the person being approached, imagine a bubble around yourself or ground yourself in your favourite way, you can empathise without allowing the low mood to affect you.

Don’t worry about needing to ‘fix’ the problem. People are great at working through their own problems and finding a solution. Often being a sounding board is enough.

You’re under no obligation to give advice if you don’t have anything to add. Simply ask open ended questions, this will often allow the person to explore their situation and will lead to the wisdom of how to solve it. This is the ideal scenario as they now feel empowered.

If you do have advice, and you should always proceed with care, use language like ‘if it were me..’, rather than appearing to tell someone what to do – if you can tactfully point to similar experiences you’ve had without making it about you, that can be useful. Remember that similar experiences doesn’t mean the same, so it may not be the perfect solution for them – they will know.

Try not to judge or offer simplistic solutions, someone else’s problems can seem insignificant or basic to you, we all have different insecurities and experiences which shape our response to things.

If the low mood is prolonged or the issue seems serious, suggest they seek help suited to the problem. If it feels like something that will pass, always leave the door open to come back to you and pop a note in your calendar to check in with them. Take comfort from the fact they have chosen to confide in you, it clearly means they trust you, and having someone be vulnerable with you can be a real gift.

Afterwards, do some self healing reiki, do a short meditation, take a salt bath or brisk walk. Don’t forget to recenter yourself. Proper self care is really important, fit your own gas mask first.

Hope this is helpful as we enter into the Christmas period, I know many of us are the ‘fixers’ in our families and it’s so important we can play that role without becoming depleted ourselves.

If you are alone, and feel this way, please do know you can reach out to us too